lovefull

Never thought that I... would be back here.

As much as I don't want to rant, Guess that's what I'm here for.

Maybe to vent out things..

Just not to keep it all inside..

So am I not that helpful at all. Well maybe I could try a bit harder.

I really don't want to exhaust myself explaining my side.

I understand you are tired of all the things happening around you

and would want to have all the help you can get.

But then again, What I have is all the help I can give. 

I can give it a bit more and exert more effort.

But with the words i'm hearing, You could instead give me a push.

I didn't ask your help with most of the things cause I know it is my responsibility.

Thinking about it, the line above is another point of argument for you if ever you get to read this.

And now I imagine I get to be bombarded with whatsoever things that would be running inside your mind.

I know I have said words to hurt you. I wouldn't deny that.

I don't want to reflect back the ideas that you yourself have been implying.

I really would like to say that I don't know what to do at this point.. 

but the sad thing is I do. But how could I do that.. when all the things I'm hearing from you

are all complaints of what life has to offer. I appreciate you for all the things that you've done 

and all the things you are doing, it's just that I failed to say or make you feel it.

As much as I would want to explain myself, it would be pointless as the police says

you have the right to remain silent. everything you say can be used or maybe used against you.

P.S. So the apple does really not fall off far from the tree. I'm trying to be not like him but unconciously react like him.

Need to control anger, feelings, voice and reaction. But somehow I now get to understand why he acted that way.

Now I'm not sure if I need to tell her all about this or just keep it all with me. Just like the old times..