lovefull

When you feel like giving up.. and there's no one to turn to.. sigh.. i know.. i told myself not to feel this way.. i told myself to be strong.. but i can't help it.. i couldn't stop thinking about you. about the past.. about what could've been.. what might have been... 81 days have passed and still everything you said still lingers in my mind. I've been haplessly trying to manipulate this reality but to no avail.. i always fail.

I feel drained. Everyday.. i wake up.. to this boring life of mine.. Now i know how it really feels to be alone.. to curl up in the corner of my room.. to cry myself to sleep, everynight.

I wish i could smile.. the way i used to.. when we were still together.. when i still had you.

"Naranasan mo na bang maging masaya? Yung sayang hindi tulad ng karaniwan mong nararamdaman. Yung sayang hindi mo kayang ipaliwanag. Yung tuwang ilang araw mo nang naiisip/nararamdaman, pero hindi ka nagsasawa. Yung tuwang walang paltos na nakakapagpangiti sayo hanggang tenga at wala kang pakialam kung ngumingiti ka na ng mag isa. Ang sarap nun." - sabi niya..

I have written something entitled "Bugso ng damdamin". Saved in my drafts.. not knowing if i should post that entry. The thing is I've got so many to things to tell to you.. but then.. i'm thinking if..

somethings are better left unsaid.. and some questions are better left unanswered.